If you want to get married, here are some simple tips that could help you move further, in the process:
Make sure that God is on the throne of your life. Marriage is a necessity, and God is eager to supply it. And since, probably this is the biggest decision you make, why trust your own instincts to choose the right person? God is the best intermediary to unite couples. Ask Him to guide you.
Make spiritual growth your priority. A marriage is strong when both the husband and the wife are strong. If someone is spiritually immature, the problems will multiply. That is why you should spend your bachelor years, becoming a mature disciple. Get involved in a church, study the Word of God and become a passionate worshiper.
Make a list of your preferences in a relationship. Today, everyone is searching for a perfect life partner online. That is why people use different dating apps or get them-self registered on best matrimonial sites to find someone who meet their requirements. It is okay to want certain qualities in a spouse. Maybe, you prefer a girl who is shorter, a boy older than you, or someone who has a certain academic background. Psalm 37: 4 says, “Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will grant you the desires of your heart.” Just check your motivations, and make sure your desires are not selfish or unrealistic.
Get rid of your false expectations and fantasies. Many singles have unrealistic ideas about what marriage and romance are about. Some girls have been conditioned by the characters of Disney, to wait for a boy who throws himself at his feet, and take them to his fairy-tale castle. That’s not gonna happen. Nor will you feel the level of gallantry described in romantic novels. Pornography has also ruined the romance; some boys who are addicted to it, can not even experience a normal excitement, without seeing it. Go down to earth and the real world. Marriage will never resemble your perfect dream world.
Set your high moral standards, and never sell them. Every single Christian needs a list of non-negotiable. Never make concessions with your sexual purity. If a boy, who speaks sweetly, who is on the worship team of your church, tries to attract you to a situation of one night, rejects its charm. If you feel attracted to a girl and then you realize that she flirts with all the boys and does not share your values, go back. And never, even go out with a non-believer, with the intention of converting him. The “missionary appointment” very rarely has good results.
Keep busy with your life and career. The worst thing any single person can do is sit down and wait for their life partner. Depression is not attractive – it is plaintive. God loves you as you are, and you do not need a husband or wife to feel valuable. Live your life. Finish your education, achieve your professional goals, and get involved in the ministry. You are more likely to find your life partner, while signing up on matrimonial websites pursuing your dreams, or than if you are sitting in a corner, lamenting your singleness. (And remember: Love does not pay bills, you need a job, to get married!).
Seek emotional healing. I know singles who jump from one dysfunctional relationship to the next, and never realize they have serious problems to deal with. Do not wait until you are married to realize that you have addictions, bitterness or unresolved pain. If you do not get rid of your drama now, your marriage matrimony will be full of drama. Look for the ministry of prayer in your church or a counselor.
Take care physically. You do not have to be a magazine cover girl or a novel beau to find a life partner. We come in all shapes and sizes, and your spouse is going to love you with all your imperfections. But making yourself more attractive or attractive will not hurt you! If it always seems that you have just gotten out of bed, ask some sincere friends to help you with a makeover. If you need to lose weight, stop making excuses and start a healthy eating plan, in addition to having an exercise routine.
Develop an active social life. Some Christian kids I know are afraid to ask a girl to go out with them for coffee, but they play video games all day long, while complaining about their loneliness. Hello? You will never find a couple in a vacuum. You have to get out of your shell and make yourself available. You do not have to match when you meet with a group of singles to fraternize. Many relationships begin as innocent friendships, and then, a romantic spark turns into fire.
Find a married mentor to help you prepare. You do not have to navigate the adventure of dating to marriage, all by yourself. Find a friend who is older than you, trustworthy, to help you. Make questions. Share your fears Marriage is a great decision, but a mentor can give you the courage to embrace your future. And then, you will be encouraging your wedding, as strong as possible, because you will have played a small part in the miracle of God.