The Top 3 Reasons To Tint Your Windows

To keep out that Accursed Sun

We’ve all done it. Whether we’ve just spent the evening cramming for a final, spent a weekend in a dark living room watching a monster movie marathon, or just emerged from our cave of a room after spending a week trying to get to level 85 with nothing but Hot Pockets and Mountain Dew, we’ve all left the safety of our dark lairs forgetting that there is a giant ball of fire in the sky.

You don’t have to be a vampire to know that the sun burns, especially when you’ve been inside a dark room for a long period of time. But apparently the sun is good for you or something. So why not save yourself the trouble of ever going outside and just get your windows tinted? The sunlight comes in and you never have to go out.

Walking Around without the Hassel of Blinds

Who has the time to open blinds let alone close them? I sure don’t. And if you’re anything like me, you don’t even bother putting on pants some days. God gave us boxers for a reason.

Also if you’re like me, then you’ve also received the occasional court summons for indecent exposure. I still don’t understand what the problem was. Like I told the judge, hey, if they didn’t want to see anything, they shouldn’t have been looking in the first place (that didn’t go over too well in court).

Okay, so fast forward a couple of months. I recently had my windows tinted and now I can do what I want without pissing off the neighbors. As an extra bonus with tinted windows, they have to come up real close to see what it is you’re doing in there. And you can catch the peeping toms in the act and give them a taste of their own medicine.

Because it’s the one thing the Hendersons don’t have Yet

Sometimes it’s nice to not be a follower. Everyone knows that the Hendersons, a few houses down always get the nicest things before anyone else does. The Hendersons get a pool, and then everyone else gets a pool. They got satellite TV, and then everyone else got satellite TV. They got the flu, and then everyone else got the flu. It was only by pure luck that neighbor George Williams ended-up getting bronchitis.

What’s the one thing they don’t have though? That’s right, tinted windows. Mrs. Henderson thinks they’re gaudy and prefers those imported hand-stitched curtains made out of yak hair. Gag. So, why not show Dave Henderson who’s the real trend setter in your neighborhood and get yourself some tinted windows?

Before long, everyone will be watching to see what you do next, and not just because the tinted windows make it look like you’re hiding something. You’re not hiding anything; you’re showing them who the king of the block is.

By Andrew Whittaker

Andrew is a graduate of Utah Valley University’s Creative Writing program & enjoys helping people find home window tinting Utah based companies. In his free time, Andrew likes to write Fantasy novels.