If you run a bar then you probably have a decent idea of the type of customer you are hoping to attract. This will clearly influence the design, the music and the overall feel of the place.
However, no matter what your target market is, you would surely get excited if the world’s smoothest spy walked into it. Would he settle down and have a great time or turn round and walk straight back out while making a withering comment about the place?
Don’t Get His Drink Wrong
You already know what kind of drink he likes, don’t you? So whatever you do, don’t stir his martini. I never realised before how big a difference this makes but I just did some research and, well, it’s actually quite boring stuff but there is a difference and no one knows it better than 007. In a couple of films he also showed a penchant for fine wines, so you don’t want to try and fob him off with some cheap rubbish you got at a bargain price from the local wholesalers. He always seems to stay in control even when he is drinking, so you shouldn’t have any worries about having to throw him out or pour him into a taxi at closing time.
Give Him Meat
It is quite strange that we don’t see more of Bond eating in the films. I haven’t seen them all but in the ones I have watched I can’t really remember him eating much at all. However, in the books he is a big red meat eater. This is going to lead to disappointment in a lot of pubs, isn’t it? After all, if all you can offer is a tepid Shepherd’s Pie with virtually no meat in it then he isn’t going to be very impressed. He is a big fan of caviar, lamb and beef. You probably won’t want to make a bulk order for caviar on the off chance that he drops in but you could look at using the likes of a beef biltong distributor to boost the range of snacks you offer to carnivorous spies in need of a bite to eat. This sort of product has enough meaty goodness to keep 007 happy while he sips his martini and relaxes. As well as getting hold of a suitable beef biltong distributor you might also want to get more meat in general, to added into your meals and snacks. He likes a curry as well if I recall correctly.
Make the Company Suitable
Would Bond feel at home with your locals? He is used to mixing with glamorous people in his job and I can’t imagine him sitting talking about the latest football results for hours on end. You can’t be expected to weed out the SMERSH agents or dangerous chaps with deadly hats but if you could add some glamorous ladies into the list of locals then you have more chance of getting the spy to become a regular. Once he is off on a new mission you might not seem him for months but he will probably be back to enjoy the company once he has dispatched his latest target.
Find the Right Entertainment
Would James Bond like a go on your karaoke machine or would he fancy his chances of winning the weekly quiz? With such a stressful life I guess that he would most like to relax in your pub and maybe read the paper or listen to some music. If you can give him this as well as the other points we have looked at then you will be well on your way to making your pub his favourite haunt. Of course, I can’t guarantee that this presence won’t attract some unsavoury characters and the odd fight in there.
Calvin Ford is a big fan of James Bond and knows that with the right sort of drinks, a beef biltong distributor and some peace and quiet you could get 007 into your pub on a regular basis.